“I was such a dope today at work. I didn’t get anything right. That meeting with my supervisor started the day off on the wrong foot. Speaking of feet, I stuck both of mine in my mouth. I didn’t have any answers when it came to the Belvey project, and only half-hearted ideas for what to do about Ainsworth. I left the meeting feeling really down and couldn’t concentrate very well on what I had to do the rest of the morning. I took too many breaks trying to revive myself. I ate too much for lunch. Miriam and Jordan took me out. They said I needed a pick-me-up, and they were right. But a pick-me-up isn’t eating the whole thing. And I ate everything in sight. I knew I was doing it, but I couldn’t stop myself. No self-control whatsoever.
The aftermath is no better. I regret everything about this morning, including overeating at lunch. I’m just a never satisfied fatty. This is the aftermath, and I still can’t get it together. What’s wrong with me? I’m just a lazy slob. I don’t even have the talent I need to do my job. I have to pull it together before I go home today. I suck.”
Here’s a woman who is highly critical of herself. She can’t place a limit on her feelings and her actions. She isn’t able to find it within herself to sustain her self-esteem. She is having trouble soothing herself out of the emotional rut she is in. She is many pounds overweight, and she has been this way for quite a long time. What this woman doesn’t realize is that being so critical of herself was one of the main causes for her to turn to food and gain all that weight in the first place. Now she is critical of herself as well for gaining all that weight. There is no end in sight to her self-criticism.
Have you ever felt like this? What did you do?