Maria's Last Diet

Thinking You Can Do It—Each Weight-Loss Step

by Maria's Last Diet

Thinking you can do it is often what makes the difference when you are bringing your behavior in line with your weight-loss goals.

Can you go that extra mile today, make dinner for the family as well as keep to your weight-loss routine? Do you think you can assuage your hurt feelings in some way other than by snacking beyond reasonable limits? What about the dinner party on Saturday? Will it be an occasion where you eat out of control like you usually do?

Why does thinking you can do it make a difference in these kinds of situations? First of all, let’s consider the opposite of “thinking you can”, “thinking you can’t do it”. What happens to you when you take this kind of negative outlook? You might not really work at it. Thinking you can, on the other hand, gives you a better chance of ‘working at it’. Working at it implies being more motivated, perhaps even more curious, definitely more persistent, and in all likelihood, willing to tolerate mistakes and even learn from them.

 

Self-Esteem Issues and Women and Their Weight

by Maria's Last Diet

Are you someone who has based your sense of self-esteem on what you weigh? Do you think thinner women are better than you? Consider this matter carefully before you answer.

For example, what are you like when you are going to your doctor for a checkup and you know you will be weighed? What happens when you put on a bathing suit? How do you take a comment by a family member or friend about your weight? How do you feel about yourself when you see a thinner woman?

Try this. Draw a circle and think of it like a pie. Divide the pie into pieces with each piece representing the different influences on your self-esteem. You might have weight as one piece, accomplishments as another, relationships as still another, and so forth. See how big each piece is relative to the others and to the whole pie. This should give you a good idea of how much your weight affects your level of self-esteem.

 

Two Weight-Loss Issues Besides Shedding Those Extra Pounds

by Maria's Last Diet

There is a lot more to losing weight than number of pounds lost. Your own evaluation of your appearance and how significant your weight and shape are for your self-esteem are matters that will surely have widespread ramifications.

Of course you might not feel good about yourself if you are too heavy. But does not feeling good about yourself because of your weight have an impact on being able to lose your unwanted weight? It does and it does.

Some women are motivated to lose weight by not looking like they want to. Their negative evaluation of their appearance and their resulting low sense of self-esteem give them sufficient motivation to get to work at shedding those extra pounds. Some women, however, who also can’t stand their appearance and feel demoralized by their low level of self-esteem, go in the opposite direction. They are motivated to give up their weight-loss journey..

Which are you? And what makes the difference for you?

 

Doubting Yourself When You’re Having a Problem Losing Weight

by Maria's Last Diet

How often have you been down in the dumps about not being able to shed your extra pounds? Did failure to lose your unwanted weight result in a spell of self-doubt?

If so, why not repair your self-doubt by writing about positive aspects of yourself unrelated to the weight-loss process? Research has shown that this kind of self-affirmation in another domain works wonders for the repair of self-doubt.

Self-Esteem Issues and Having Trouble Losing Weight

by Maria's Last Diet

“You’ll never lose weight. You’ll always be a very fat woman.”

Why would you stay with someone who thinks of you like this?

If you think poorly of yourself, you might just stay with a partner who thinks poorly of you too. While you may want the other person to think favorably of you, as you think more about the matter, you will decide that you are getting what you deserve. You will be more comfortable being thought of unfavorably if you have an unfavorable impression of yourself as well.

Although this may sound farfetched to you, research on self-verification shows that people with negative self-evaluations and low self-esteem seek to verify their self-perceptions, and they may do so by picking or staying with a partner who reinforces their self-perception.

As you may expect, the need for such negative self-verification from your partner will play havoc with your effort to drop your weight.

 

Weight-Loss Challenges: Are You Up for Them? Check This Out.

by Maria's Last Diet

Losing weight is a bunch of challenges, like getting yourself to do what it takes to start, stick to it, and then keep the weight off once you lose it.

Are you up for the challenges that the weight-loss process presents?

How confident* are you 

     not at all        somewhat         moderately       pretty        very  
 
that you can…

1. resist overeating or eating the wrong foods when you’re anxious
2. control your eating on the weekends
3. resist overeating or eating the wrong foods when you feel physically run down
4. resist overeating or eating the wrong foods when you’re watching TV
5. resist overeating or eating the wrong foods when you’re feeling down
6. resist overeating or eating the wrong foods when you’re irritable (angry)
7. resist overeating or eating the wrong foods when you’re at a party
8. resist overeating or eating the wrong foods when other people are pressuring you to eat

Being confident—realistically confident—will help you meet these weight-loss challenges head on.


*Fashioned after The Weight Efficacy Lifestyle Questionnaire

For All The Weight-Loss Steps You Have to Take, How Confident Are You

by Maria's Last Diet

During the course of the weight-loss process you will probably find that you have lots of confidence for some things but not for others. You might, for example, feel quite confident in sticking to a diet. Yet you might lack confidence when it comes to recovering from a setback, like falling off your diet.

Don’t expect to have the same level of confidence for all the different weight-loss activities you undertake. Hang on to this idea, because it is what will help keep your overall confidence working for you.

Weight-Loss Challenges: Are You Up For Them?

by Maria's Last Diet

What do you about eating when ________________?*

   you are anxious

   it’s the weekend

   you have to say “no” to others

   you are physically run down

   you are watching TV

   you are feeling down

   there are many different kinds of food available

   it’s impolite to refuse seconds

   you have a headache

   you are reading

   you are irritable

   you are at a party

   others are pressuring you to eat

   you are going to bed

   you experience failure

   high calorie foods are available

   you think others will be upset if you don’t eat

   you feel uncomfortable

   you are happy

These are all challenging situations for someone who wants to lose her unwanted weight. How much confidence do you have in yourself? In how many of these situations could you do what it takes to stick to the weight-loss process?

Backed up by realistic appraisal of your ability and resourcefulness, it’s the “I can do it” attitude that enables you to wade headlong into these ubiquitous weight-loss challenges and emerge unscathed.

*from   Clark, M, Abrams, D, & Niaura, R. Self-Efficacy in Weight Management. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 1991, 59, 5, 739-744.

 

Women’s Weight Loss—Watch Out for Hidden Goals

by Maria's Last Diet

Thinking well of yourself is an up and down process if you are a woman trying to lose your unwanted weight. There is something truly unflattering about all that you go through just to shed those extra pounds. No matter what, you want to think well of yourself.

To continue to think well of yourself is one of the hidden goals in the weight-loss process. To accomplish this mighty feat, you have to ward off the negative implications of some of your behavior, your missteps, your outright mistakes, your foolishness, your dishonesty, your excuses. This is all in the service of preserving your good sense of self-esteem, which, by the way, is so necessary for successful weight loss.

Let’s look for a moment at some of the ways you might ward off threats to your self-esteem. You could, for instance, distort information and feedback; not let yourself accurately process what you observe. You could resort to alternative ways of interpreting what you just did. You might hold on to cherished beliefs despite contradictory findings. You may just not notice, or you may selectively attend to the good but not to the bad. You could make something a lot smaller than it really is, minimize it in your mind, not spend any time dwelling on it or thinking about it; get away from it as soon as you can.

There are lots of ways to escape from and distance yourself from whatever it is that could make you not think well of yourself. Such defensive tactics are pretty natural when it comes to protecting your self-worth. Trying to lose weight and keep it off, if you’re doing it right, puts you in a vulnerable position, and puts your self-worth in jeopardy. It’s a situation that calls for ramping up all your defensive tactics. The same defenses that you use to protect your level of self-esteem are what also disrupt your clear-headed thinking and vital action taking.

The value of defending your self-esteem so you can use it to do what it takes to lose weight ironically must be weighed against the cost of defending your self-esteem to the point where your weight-loss effort suffers.

 

Your General Self-Esteem Is Different Than Your Body-Esteem

by Maria's Last Diet

There’s general self-esteem. That’s where you evaluate yourself—your whole self. Then there’s body-esteem. You guessed it. That’s where you evaluate your body. Are you, for instance, satisfied with your weight? What about your appearance? And, what do you think other people think of your body and your appearance?

    “I like the way I look when I see myself in the mirror.”

    “I’m happy with my weight.”

    “Other people like my looks.”

That’s a high level of body-esteem.

Here are some other possibilities.

    “I don’t like what I look like in pictures.”

    “My weight makes me unhappy.”

    “I won'’t wear clothes that show my figure.”

This, of course, is a much lower level of body-esteem.

Now as you can imagine, it is all too easy for women who are dealing with a weight issue to let their feelings and thoughts about their bodies affect their overall sense of self-esteem. And, it works the other way round as well. If you have low self-esteem, you may find that you also have a low opinion of your body.