Whether to, whether not to. Guilt either way.
That’s the downfall of cravings.
It just came upon you. You must have some. It’s been on your mind off and on throughout the day. You just must have some of your favorite candy. A piece of chocolate. Just a few gummy bears. Skittles for me.
It’s after work and you’re on your way home. Your favorite candy is on your mind more than ever. You’re thinking of stopping to get some, but that would mean searching around for somewhere to get them. You’ll have to wait if you want to get them at your local supermarket because you’re nowhere near that now. Waiting is out of the question, though, and stopping, well that’s pretty inconvenient, since you’ll have to search for a parking space, maybe even walk a block or more. You’re tired and you want to get home.
These are all the convenience thoughts. Right on top of the convenience thoughts come the “should I” “shouldn’t I” thoughts. You’ll eat the candy and then eat dinner too. You’re trying to lose weight. It’s Monday, after all, and you ate like there was no tomorrow on Saturday. Now’s the time to make up for it. You were good on Sunday. Dinner was only a small portion of cottage cheese and sour cream, and you went to bed feeling very unfull. But I really do want some candy.
It’s like an eenie meenie miney mo game where you are the one doing the eenie meenies, and each time you start either on yourself or the other person knowing full well how to determine who the winner will be. Of course you’re going to stop for the candy despite all your protestations. Lately, you’ve been in the “I’m going to satisfy my craving groove,” and this time will be no different. Damn the ambivalence, full speed ahead.