Where is my goal when I need it?
Tired from a hard day’s work. Kicking back watching TV. Dinner is done. The dishes are put away for the night. So are the kids. It’s just me. My husband is out of town.
Into the kitchen I go and scout around for something to snack on. Rationalization: to help me relax. There’s lots to choose from. Good stuff and bad stuff. Of course I’m tempted by the bad stuff. I give in to my temptation, and out the window goes my diet.
Where is my weight loss goal when I need it? Why couldn’t I pull out my goal and wave it in front of my eyes to remind myself, to stop myself, to block myself from giving in to temptation?
I’ve done it before; not be tempted, that is. I had a lot of practice resisting the kind of temptation I gave into tonight. All that practice strengthened my resolve, and if I wanted a snack, I selected more of a diet food snack, no problem. But tonight. What was so different about tonight?
(After a little thinking) I’m frustrated and angry, feeling lonely and abandoned. Yes, I’m happy the kids are tucked up for the night. One less responsibility. I’m angry and frustrated because it’s all on me. My husband can go tra-la-la-ing off while I’m stuck being breadwinner number two, cook, cleaner, dishwasher, perfect mom, counselor to two kids, chauffeur, and who knows what else.
Where is my goal when I need it? Buried under the need to cut loose from my life.